When saying no is the right answer

The other day, I received an offer that sounded both fun and interesting. I started drafting a reply:

“Absolutely, that sounds great! I’m looking forward…”

Then I paused.

Something didn’t feel quite right.

I deleted the message and instead replied that I’d get back with an answer the next day.

I let it go and slept on it. And when I woke up the next morning, I immediately knew what the right thing to do was: I politely turned down the offer.

It’s so easy to say yes to things—much easier than saying no. We want to be helpful, kind, reliable. We want to be seen in a good light.

But saying no is hard. It can make you feel like a self-centered douchebag.

And yet, sometimes we need to put ourselves first. Neither we nor the people around us benefit when we show up half-heartedly. It shows, it’s felt, and it leaves a mark.

Taking care of ourselves is often a way of taking care of others, too. We do it because we want to do what’s right—and do it well.

A heartfelt no can be an act of kindness.